Etiquette for arts-lovers
Ever feel like London audiences are forgetting their Ps and Qs? Read on for our essential rules of cultural engagement, as compiled by Laura Tennant
Could we be getting grumpy in our old age? Recently, Londoners seem to have been queue-barging, talking and laughing in all the wrong places, so we decided to let off steam with our very own guide to etiquette for arts lovers. Want to share what drives you mad at theatre, cinema, concert hall and the like? Head to our Facebook page and we'll add to the best posts to our list
1. On a first date? Exhibitions and galleries offer a tempting opportunity to show off your aesthetic sensibilities, true, but giggly and noisy conversation is distracting for less excited gallery-goers
2. Like libraries, museums and galleries suit tones of hushed reverence – or even better, contemplative silence
3. Skirting around the back of another visitor who steps back to admire a painting is preferable to barging in front of them
4. At the theatre, avoid laughing when someone dies unless you are very sure indeed it is supposed to be funny
5. Noises intended to demonstrate you ‘get it’ (especially with a knowing ‘Ha!’) are unnecessary and infuriating – it isn’t a competition
6. It is the most appalling bad form to get up and leave before the interval except in a genuine emergency (you are on fire, or are about to wet yourself)
7. The cinema is different from watching television in private. You are sharing a public space, not in the comfort of your own home, so do not check your phone, text, sniff, kick the seat in front, or eat bag after bag of noisy crisps
8. At all but the mosh pits of the most crowded gigs, it is possible to maintain two inches of personal space around yourself – jiggling, bumping, leaning and shoving are infra-dig
9. It is not OK to arrive at a gig late and burrow your way into the crowd to occupy a non-space just in front of someone else, in the process shoving them out of the way. If they are shorter than you, it is even worse
10. At festivals, human daisy chains of over-privileged teens who barge their way to the front of any event need putting to bed without any supper
11. In London, it’s unnecessary to clap after every aria and pas de deux, and standing ovations are reserved for only the most stupendous of performances
12. If you arrive at the theatre late, face forwards when you wriggle down the aisle past your fellow audience members – who, by the way, should make the effort to stand to ease your passage (thanks to the FT’s Agony Aunt David Tang for the clarification on front or backwards-facing sliding).